I’ve been gearing up for my friend’s baby shower and I really wanted to make something handmade and special for her. I don’t mean to be cheap, but I really do not have much money now. Still, lack of spending money wasn’t the reason I first decided to make something special for her and for the baby. My whole life, I grew up watching my mom and her sisters make beautiful gifts for others. The five sisters and her three brothers are all artists in some way. I love seeing all the amazingly creative gifts they come up with for every occasion. I know that I am very talented in some ways, but when it comes to some things, there is an interruption, a stall, and my hands won’t do what in my head I KNOW exactly how it should be. I could ‘see’ perfect directions on how to accomplish something, but when I try to do it, I just mess it up.
I’ve made quite a few aprons at this point, but tonight I got started on an apron idea I KNOW should be easy to do. I planned to make a full apron that has a large front pocket, divided into four pockets. I planned to make this apron out of one material and the pocket(s) out of another. I knew how to cut it and construct it. I had all the separate pieces laid out. I did a test and made sure that the big pocket would be able to be sewn into smaller ones that would fit, a bottle, pacifier, rattle, diaper/wipes, ointment, and a burp rag -(made by yours truly) which would match the apron fabric. Because the apron fabric is race cars (she’s having a boy) I thought I’d still dress it up and make it a little girly and add some red ruffles around the trim. Not so hard, I’ve added ruffles to things that probably didn’t even need ruffles.
So, after the whole thing is more or less completed, my mind just stalled, I’m in the middle of attaching what I think is the back piece to the apron and I look at it and all is well, look again and I think I’m good. So I finish the back, adding the ruffles in between the fabric and take it off the machine to look at it and mark where the ties will go. I leave a little space on each ‘side’ between the back and front and do the ties last. Well I didn’t get that far because as I reach for the ties with one hand and start smoothing out the apron with the other, I realize that I did not grab the back piece for the apron. No, somehow I pulled the ‘extra fabric that should’ve been parts of the ruffles to one side and sewed the entire thing nearly in half.
Yes, it’s 2am, but 2am to me is a ‘normal’ person’s 5pm. I worked an eight hour shift tonight, but I’m not too tired, my brain, I thought was working well. This is just me. I’m a real idiot sometimes. Even when I check and double check and triple check something, I can manage to screw it up. So, the wonderful thing would be me just taking a seam ripper to it and salvaging it, but I can’t, the way the fabric is, you can clearly see the needle holes that go all over the front and there is just no coming back from that. I tried to see if I added some ruffles over it if it would work, but it goes in funny shape and there’s no way I can. Do I have additional fabric? Sure, but not any that is ‘boy’ fabric. I have enough for the burp rag, but that’s it. Long ago I accepted that my brain is odd and that I can usually not create art unless it resembles something from Picasso or Rothko. But I made aprons before! This shouldn’t have been hard and there was no reason for such a big mistake.
I don’t know what to do. She is coming to stay with me tomorrow, for two nights before her shower, so it’s not like I can just be like… ‘Oh hey’ you’re on your own in my house while I just go sit for hours in my room and sew something. I don’t even have fabric to do that. Now, I’m going to have to hope I can get a chance to go to a store and buy something extremely cheap. This is a major *headdesk* moment.
So here’s hoping that tomorrow things might look brighter. Maybe little elves will come into my room overnight and make me the apron exactly as it should’ve been. LOL!